A New Kind of Torture

As they say on one wise website, runbare.com, "If you’re smiling, your doing something right and if not, then stop, rest, and recollect."

My new kind of torture is the pain in the ball of my foot.  This pain is mostly in the left foot.  It comes with every step.  In mid-November, it was starting to bother me, so I started listening to my feet.

What did I do?  I switched from my Vibrams and Vivo Barefoots back to New Balance running shoes and Clarks some days.  I added padded insoles.  Removed a corn.  Rested as much as possible.  Which is hard to do when you teach elementary school, and trying to keep tabs on all 30 students for 6 hours.  I iced, I massaged, I soaked in the hot tub.

In early December, I decided I was rested enough to go on a hike.  Thinking this was just a 3 mile jaunt, I was optimistic, so wore my veebs but brought my running shoes just in case.  Ooh, man!  It turned out to be 6+ miles, and steep trails.  I cried the last half of the hike.  Haven't been able to go for a hike or even a walk since.

Luckily, I loooove to swim, so I'm still active a few times a week.  I also had two weeks off for the holidays, and cancelled the plans to walk around San Francisco and hike the hills.  Lots of movies, reading, and crafting.  Back at school this month, I use my rolling chair and my stool as much as possible.  I sit on desks, tables and counters whenever I can, reminding my students that only I can do this, because I'm an "old lady." 

But it's getting me down.  Yes, even sunny, optimistic me.  Pain can do that.  I've spent some sleepless nights, laying there wondering what I'm going to do for the next fifty years if I can't hike or walk.  At the end of a long day teaching, especially after a field trip, my temper tends to flare as the soles of my feet throb with every step.

What now? 
The torture continues. 

I've thought of going back to the podiatrist, but she was the one who told me there was no therapy, that I would have hammertoes, and eventually surgery.  She convinced me to order expensive custom orthotics that make my toes float in the shoe, so I can't avoid walking the old heel-strike way. Besides, they don't fit in any of my shoes.  I may consider talking to her again, but only after doing my own research. 

So today I dug out my old over-the-counter orthotics with the metatarsal bump that I bought at Footwear over a year ago.  Some relief.  Icing and resting more.  And doing some online research. 

Anybody out there have an answer?

Don't Lose Hope; Follow Your Passions

Sometimes we are motivated by the most unlikely events or people.  Other times we have such a strong intrinsic motivation that outside forces do not easily dissuade us.

This week Sir John Gurdon won the Nobel prize in physiology or medicine with Shinya Yamanaka for their work as pioneers in stem cell research.  Mr. Gurdon was not encouraged by his teachers to be a scientist.  On the contrary, his dreams were dismissed as "ridiculous."

 Gurdon school report, aged 15

"I believe Gurdon has ideas about becoming a scientist; on his present showing this is quite ridiculous; if he can't learn simple biological facts he would have no chance of doing the work of a specialist, and it would be a sheer waste of time, both on his part and of those who would have to teach him." bbc.co.uk/news/health

View this Sir John Gurdon video.

This story brings to mind my experience with a Spanish professor in college.  I was a Spanish major, and loved speaking Spanish in high school, but had very little success in Dr. Lopez's class.  I was nowhere near ready to discuss literary criticism of the works of Federico García Lorca or Don Quijote.  I decided to take a semester in Bogotá, Colombia to immerse myself in the language and culture.  When I asked Dr. Lopez for a letter of recommendation, he laughed at me. "Susan, you will never learn Spanish."  Rather than be dissuaded by his lack of confidence, I knew I had to prove him wrong.  And I did.  Upon returning to the U.S. after my semester abroad, I approached my old professor and showed him how my Spanish had improved, no thanks to him.

As a patient, I continue to reject the prognosis of my podiatrist.  She examined my sore and swollen feet, and she told me there was no way to prevent the onset of hammertoes.  She asserted that my toes would eventually curl up permanently, my foot pad would move forward and stop protecting the ball of my foot, and I would eventually need surgery.  I am proving her wrong.  My foot strength and flexibility continue to improve through "barefoot walking."  My vibrams continue to be my shoes of choice for walking, hiking, even for work.

As a teacher, this story reminds me to encourage my students in their passions, and to withhold judgement about their future abilities.  For goodness sake, my kids are only 9 and 10 years old.  Their brains and bodies are developing at an astounding rate.  Each one develops his or her academic and social skills at a different rate.  A student may not be successful in a certain area this year, but later may jump ahead of the pack.  Why dissuade them from following their passions?  What I want to do is feed their dreams, encourage their growth, and push them on to higher heights.